Archives For ADHD

When our boy was a pre-schooler, every day when I picked him up I had to listen to what he had, or hadn’t done, that day. When we got his ADHD medication adjusted, I was hoping for some relief. I got to school to pick him up, and the lady at the desk handed me a piece of paper telling me that he had failed his eye test of all things! Now there was something else to deal with. Discouraged? You bet.

The years pass too quickly to imagine. In this third session of lamenting a different child, I want to tell you what a wonderful and Godly young man he is today.

A non-ADHD male brain does not fully mature until age 25. It has taken our son a longer than usual time to figure out what he wants to do with his life, but after a few lessons from the University of Hard Knocks, he is in college and has a direction in mind.

He has been home from school this summer and has worked on an asphalt crew. Hard and dirty work, but fulfilling nonetheless. At 25, he is maturing wonderfully.

We have always had what we’ve called our “Saturday Morning Conversations” where we talk together about deeper things, such as God’s plans for our lives, how to correctly handle a particular situation, and other hearty topics. Recently he told me how he wants to live a holy life, and how in his position this semester as Wing Advisor at college, he wants to be a servant leader, helping those who are struggling. I have no doubt that he be a great role model for other students.

Love Heart, if God has gifted you with one who at this stage is making you crazy, just hang on. It doesn’t matter if they are 5 or 35, God is still in control, and has created them for a purpose. Don’t give up!   Know this…He loves you and your child more than you can imagine!

“You have searched me, Lord,

and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise;

you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down;

 you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue

you, Lord, know it completely.

You hem me in behind and before,

and you lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,

 too lofty for me to attain.”  (Psalm 139:1-6)

No mistake made here. God knows everything and is completely in control. Gwen~

More on our different children.

If your child has a disability that is not obvious, it seems that folks are all the more likely to tell you what you’re doing wrong, and how you should fix the “problem.” The usual advice includes “bustin’ his backside.” If the situation calls for it, maybe so. But that’s not always the case. In fact, sometimes it just makes matters worse.

A brain positron emission tomography (PET) scan is an imaging test of the brain. Trying everything we could think of to help our son, we had one of these test done. You can see the vast difference in an ADHD brain and a non-ADHD brain in the picture.  We learned that the parts of his brain that should be working fast were working slowly. Conversely, the parts that should be working slowly were working very fast. At least we now had positive proof that there was something different about him other than his attitude.

When we face challenges, we sometimes ask, “Why me?” Why not you, Love Heart? Let’s remember our scripture. Psalm 139:13-16.

“For you created my inmost being;

you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

 your works are wonderful,

I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you

    when I was made in the secret place,

when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.

Your eyes saw my unformed body;

all the days ordained for me were written in your book

before one of them came to be.”

The God of the Universe, the King of the World, has not made a mistake. He didn’t get distracted in the middle of brain making and let things slip. For HIS reasons, your child’s differences were designed. You will probably never know, this side of heaven or maybe beyond, why your kiddo is like he or she is. The wonderful news is that God knew you’d be the perfect one to raise this magnificant creation.   This you must do – Trust God!

My tip for today. Love, love, love the one, or ones, God has gifted you with. Gwen~

Today I want to begin a series of a few blogs about children who are “different.” If you happen to be the parent of one who struggles with his or her differences, I know you feel confused, inadequate and frustrated.

This is my story and the actions we chose. In no way am I suggesting you do what we did.

Our son was diagnosed with ADHD at 3 years old. He is adopted, and there was not much family history to go on. After much consideration and consulting with professionals, we decided that medication was the best course of action for him. A top pediatric psychiatrist in Houston, Texas advised us that if we did not medicate him, he would never be able to fulfill his potential.

While the medication was a tremendous blessing, it was also a nightmare to regulate. Trying various kinds of meds and then tweaking the dosing was tedious. Every time a new med came on the scene, we tried it. All the while, I read about ADHD and talked with those experiencing the same thing we were.

I remember talking with a mom who had a second grader with ADHD. I didn’t know the woman but had been “referred” to her as someone who might help me understand or encourage me. It was the worst conversation ever. Apparently her little guy had either had a bad day, or maybe his meds weren’t good for him, but she was anything but encouraging!

Years later, we were trying neuro feedback, which did help, when a lady told me, “Yeah, we tried that. My kid’s just a *****.” I was horrified that a mom could talk about her own child like that, no matter what was going on with him.

Here’s my tip for today. It’s good to join a support group for parents of ADHD kids if there is one in your area. The one I was in helped me understand why our son had been doing so well only to twist off. Their question to me was, “What are you doing differently?” Cough medicine was the answer. AND, try to talk to someone who has adult children with ADHD. There are days when you don’t think there could possibly be an upside to the disorder, but you’ll be surprised.

Love Heart, no matter what’s going on in your life, good, bad or indifferent, you must hang on to Jesus.  Our text from the Holy Word of God is Psalm 139:13-16.

“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.”

More next time. Gwen~

 

A Divine Appointment

November 19, 2016 — Leave a comment

I spent many hours this weekend passing out information to parents of ADHD children.  As the moms and dads walked up to our station, the desperation on their faces ripped my heart out.

As their stories unfolded there were many varying conditions and circumstances but all difficult situations.  One mom in particular touched me.  As she stood listening to the information about using neurofeedback to retrain the ADHD brain, tears slid silently down her face.  She was desperate for help for her child.

I couldn’t get that picture off my mind.  Clearly I could see her standing there with her hair in braided pigtails, with a couple of kiddos and her husband. And those tears.

As only God can do, He created a Divine Appointment.  The next day, in all the heat and dust, there she stood at our booth again.  Not to get more information, but to say hello.  I thought that I would never see her again, but here God had given me an opportunity.  I seized one of my Love Heart Ministries cards and gave it to her.

I told her I didn’t know where she was in her walk with the Lord, but I wanted to give her our website so perhaps she could get some encouragement!  She opened up to me, a total stranger, about knowing Jesus but not living as she should, but she also said that she knew God was calling to her.

Love Heart, you never know when God will send someone to you to be encouraged.  Be ready!  Gwen~